I had just arrived from Puerto Rico to Las Vegas, after monitoring Oscar De La Hoya’s controversial training camp for his fight against “Pretty Boy” Floyd Mayweather.
I was traveling to Las Vegas to cover Mayweather’s training camp when I became ill and subsequently hospitalized.
As some of you already know, I frequently participate in adult films. To make a long story short, while I was in Las Vegas, I mistakenly decided to borrow a rusty cock ring from a friend. After using it, I got a horrible infection. I was in danger of amputation and boxing was the furthest thing from my mind.
Fortunately, the doctors treated me with a heavy, consistent dose of antibiotics. I was just released from the hospital about two weeks ago and I am currently in recuperation. I would like to thank the staff of the Sunrise Hospital and Medical Center in Las Vegas, Nevada for their expertise and kindness.
FLOYD AND OSCAR NAIL BOXING’S COFFIN
I won’t touch too deep on the so-called “Fight of the Century” between De La Hoya and Mayweather because the fight was so incredibly forgettable.
Neither guy impressed and the fight made Mayweather look bad because after all the smack talking he did, he couldn't knock De La Hoya out in spectacular fashion.
Shane Mosley’s first win over an undefeated "Golden Boy" was a more exciting fight in my opinion. Furthermore, Mosley beat a prime and undefeated De La Hoya convincingly. While Mayweather had to potshot and run from an old De La Hoya.
Bottom line is, De La Hoya always comes up short when fighting young, undefeated boxers, so what Mayweather did wasn’t special.
When fighting an opponent that has already been beaten a couple of times, you need to do something unique to make your win stand out. Mayweather did nothing extraordinary which made for a boring fight. The fight could be a catalyst for a massive migration of boxing fans to join the UFC craze.
CONVICTS LOVE UFC
I am currently investigating some leads that suggest that there is a current UFC craze among incarcerated and ex-convicts. If this is true, I believe that the UFC should be banned from all television.
There have already been reports of incarcerated mix martial arts practitioners using their training to unfairly hold other inmates down using leg locks. They are also violating their manhood while maintaining them in head locks.
Inmates from prisons all across the nation are talking about an underground UFC craze. Rumors suggests that mixed martial arts is replacing boxing in the prison system.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THEY GET OUT
Is the United States of America ready for the kind of mayhem to be wreaked by the soon to be released rapists, pedophiles, and murderers that are watching the UFC in prison and honing their martial arts skills?
Eighty percent of a “successful” rape depends on the pure physicality of the rapist over their victim.
Imagine BJ Penn or Royce Gracie grabbing some woman in one of those weird Jew Jitsu locks that they do. No woman would ever be able to escape. Even if you are the boyfriend and you happen to be there, once an ex-convict gets your girl in a lock or choke, you won't be able to pry him off even if you're name was Arnold Schwarzenegger.
You’d have to go running all over the house looking for a weapon to hit him over the head with, meanwhile he’s got your girlfriend in some weird figure four leg lock and boning the crap out of her.
This is serious stuff. Do we really need serial rapists that are trained in mixed martial arts? Do we really need the UFC?
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